Repair is part of strength.
The steps
- Regulate first run the Body Reset before any significant conversation.
- Name the issue specifically "when [specific behaviour] occurred, I felt [specific emotion]."
- State the need "what I need is [specific, requestable thing]."
- Listen to the response without formulating a counter-argument.
- Find the part that is true what in their perspective is accurate?
- If flooding occurs "I need ten minutes to regulate. I will return."
- Return and complete the conversation.
Where it comes from
- Session 9 — the full handout
- Session 9 — The Repair
Prefer it one step at a time? The same protocol as a guided runner in the app, which also keeps a private record if you want one.
This is one of the tools a seventeen-session series teaches, ninety minutes at a time, in a room of six to twelve people. It is peer-facilitated and free to host.
Check what stayed 3 questions
Answer in your own words, out loud or on paper. Nothing is scored, nothing is marked, and nothing is stored — this is for noticing what you have, not for anybody to grade.
When do you reach for the Conflict Protocol?
What the material says
A significant conversation, or a disagreement that is escalating.
What happens before any significant conversation, and which tool does it?
What the material says
run the Body Reset before any significant conversation.
After listening without formulating a counter-argument, what are you looking for in what they said?
What the material says
Find the part that is true